Halloween Pirates!

 Radio Al Fansome says "Boo!"

It's only September, but it's never too early to start thinking about Halloween on the shortwave pirate radio bands! This is the best time of the year to be listening. All kinds of strange, creepy, and entertaining programming happens around Halloween. It's probably the biggest holiday of the year for shortwave pirates.

Here is a list of some of my favorite shortwave pirate stations that should be active this year. Happy DXing!

Radio Al Fansome -- Al Fansone reads the celebrity obituaries from the past year using a backing track of spooky music from old Disneyland Records. Always entertaining! This station's gotten even better since Al himself entered the great beyond. (QSLs for reports to the Intercourse, PA maildrop)

The Crystal Submarine -- John Zombie Poet, Zombie Radical, and their zombie crew play songs by the Doors in reverse, extol the virtues of Karl "Groucho" Marx, Vlad "The Impaler" Lenin, and Joe "The Butcher" Stalin. Creepy classic rock music by noted bands of the seventies. This is the first pirate to broadcast from a sunken ship! Their motto is: "If you live in a crystal ship, you shouldn't throw rocks!" (sends E-QSLs only in exchange for your name, IP address, real address, and credit card number. However, if you're nice to them on www.tcsshortwave.com, you might get a blow job from the site's operator.)

Dead Bunny -- Bootleggers from the ham radio bands send nasty SSTV images on top of other stations all weekend long between 6900 and 6980 KHz in an attempt to troll Commander Bunny. Last year we were highly entertained with rabbit butchering tips, Thumper from Disney with an arrow through his head, and a truly creepy image of a bunny in a blender. (They are not known to QSL.)

KABR "Artie Bigley Radio" -- North America's favorite shortwave pirate troublemaker dishes out the dirt on all the pirates he's stalked over the past few years in this exciting and eye-opening talk show. The fact that Artie is batshit insane goes well with the halloween theme, as does the fact that he only broadcasts on October 31 in lower side band! (Columbus)

Voice of the Trolls -- Sped-up and speech-altered dialogue between trolls commenting on the posts on Guy Faux's blog are a feature of this station. (Beware, some have reported that they QSL by sending a bag of shit to you.)

WFRN -- The rotting corpse of pirate radio fan sites usually appears around 6925 KHz with a warbly, variable signal. They feature novelty Halloween music from the likes of John Arthur and the Bog Bodies. Also featured are call-outs to listeners who long ago abandoned the scene, tips for turning your Windows 95 machine into a pirate radio listening outpost, and the creative use of sock puppets. Hosted by Bob Smith, Thumper, Beans, lovemyradios, and Mosby. (Belfast)

Voice of the Unbelievable Catastrophe -- This one is really fun! The Maharishi eats a bag of shrooms, steals a nuke and drops it on the Middle East as punishment for sentencing pot smokers to death in Saudi Arabia. As if this weren't enough, the Maharishi flies back to North America on a magic carpet and drops a truckload of camel dung on Pigmeat Martin! Reefer music and fake public service announcements featuring in-jokes about shortwave pirates and SWL Winterfest personalities make this one a must-hear! (Mount Kisco)

Slopbucket Celebrity Deathmatch Radio -- Got a tip-off that this year Fred "Booze and demerol" Roll WW4D and Karol "Radio Canada" Madera VE7KFM are scheduled to beat the living shit out of each other live on 43 meters! Be on the listen for surprise appearances from other sideband boogeymen. The referee for this year's deathmatch will be none other than FCC vixen Laura Smith. (QSLs have been received from Industrie Canada)

WBST Busted Radio -- Formerly known as "The Beast," this interesting station is notable for playing death metal using a powerful mobile rig in a van while parked in the driveway of recently busted pirates! This year broadcasting from Lansing, Michigan. (Washington, DC)

What are your favorites? Join us in the comments for more fun!